6th Grade Revisited - Diary of a Wimpy Mom

My son told me I could not be a true 6th grader until I read at least one of the Diary of a Wimpy Kid books. After reading, I have to admit it is my new favorite book now! My son was shocked; he could not believe I loved it so much. He thought I would not be able to relate. In his mind only kids go through mishaps and adventures. According to him, grown-ups lead boring lives, just pushing paper all day at work. Recently, I started a new job so to prove him wrong; letting him know that I also lead an exciting, adventurous life at work, I decided to keep a diary this week… I’ll call it Diary of a Wimpy Mom:

Monday

Last week I sent out an email to everyone in the office informing that the doors on the wooden cabinet in the break room are fragile. (Previously I had leaned up against it, in order to get something, and slightly fractured the door). The cabinet was still operational, however, if someone leaned on it again it would not be. Guess what I did this morning even after I warned everyone…









Tuesday

We’ve had a temp helping us out the past few weeks. I think I am the only one who notices that she spend 30 minutes in the bathroom at a time (I clocked it). Hmmmm…I wonder what she is doing in there?






Wednesday

For some reason my husband is obsessed with Bounce fabric sheets. Seriously! Dude will place 4 or 5 sheets in a single load of laundry. Consequently, I am constantly picking them off my clothes in the morning, and sometimes I miss one… Usually it’s the one that is stuck in a place not easily accessible!







Thursday

On Thursday’s, I have to return the space heater that I borrow from the CFO. Thursday is the only day she is in the office, so today I freeze! Therefore, I have now dubbed Thursdays as “Snuggie Day”. I am wearing a Snuggie, and I do not care what people say!






Friday

The holidays are coming up, so I asked my boss if they have pitch-ins here at the office. She said “No.” EUREKA…I just found my Shangri-la! I hate pitch-ins! My former jobs always had them, and they stress me out!









My son did the illustrations...THANK GOD!!! You would not want to see my drawings.
STAY TUNED in 2 weeks after Thanksgiving break! Have a happy Thanksgiving everyone!

6th Grade Revisited - The Bus

My son and I were doing our homework, when he casually mentioned an innocent occurrence that took place on his bus. I was unresponsive and frozen to his conversation, he tried to snap me out of it, “Mom, mom” he kept saying. “Is there something wrong?"

The buh, the buh, the bus…UGH! How could I forget about the BUS! I do not know which was worse the bus or the bullies. I think the bus may have had a slight edge. After all, it was this evil machine that took me to my 6th grade temple of doom!

The bus is the ultimate monster truck. Why are they yellow anyway? They should be red with painted flames on the side. Is society more accepting of this vile vehicle because of this palatable color? Since it is yellow, should we overlook the fact that it has no seat belts, and when the bus driver runs over a pot hole the kids fly in the air like popcorn? The poor kids suffer in the summer months without air-conditioning. In the winter, the heat is so inept except it only seems to spew properly on the bus driver?

Reminiscing with my son, I said, “Remember how you wanted to ride the bus so bad, when you were in kindergarten? I guarantee that by the time you get to high school, you will be so excited about no longer having to ride that thing... Oh how I hated the bus, I still have recurring nightmares about it.”

Sometimes my hyperbolic nature gets me into trouble, this was my son’s response:

“That is the way I feel too mom, I don’t want to ride the bus anymore. I don’t want to have nightmares. You seriously should take me to and from school from now on, it is for my own good.”

“Uhhhh that’s OK hon, you’ll be alright on the bus”…Stay Tuned

6th Grade Revisited - Sick Day

I remember some mornings during my 6th grade year were agonizing. I tried to figure out clever ways to skip school, especially if I was severely threatened the day before by the irrational bullies who tormented me. Had a lot of tricks up my sleeve to stay home, most often, I would try the old thermometer on the light bulb trick. When I should have undoubtedly been deceased one morning my mom caught on and shoved my butt out the door.

Present day… My 6th grade son woke up one morning, shuffled into our room complaining of a stuffy nose. He travels over to my husband -the softy-to tell him he is sick. He knew not to go to me. If an appendage is not falling off, I send him to school! This was their actual conversation:

Son: Dad, I don’t feel well.

Dad: Do you think you should stay home?

Son: I am not sure, what do you think?

Dad: On a scale from 1-10 how do you feel?

Son: Oh, about a 6

My husband let him stay home. WHAT?! I am on the way to work seething, as if my son and I are really peers and he just out-performed me. I am mumbling to my self in the car saying “What was that… ‘Do you think I should stay home?’ Was this some kind of reverse psychology??…the only reason why the thermometer got so high that one time…well…my mom came in the room too quickly, plus those 100 watt bulbs…WAIT A MINUTE…what am I saying"? He was actually sick; he was not trying to stay home because of bullies. As dramatic as my son is, if he were trying to say home due to fear, he would have told my husband that the Grim Reaper was standing over his bed! My son is not afraid to go to school. YEA!! As a parent you never want your child to experience the hardships you had to endure. This made me happy, I am happy that my son really is sick, sounds crazy but I would have taken a stuffy nose over bullies any day…STAY TUNED!

My Sleepganistan is a little light, Shugatopia is much better...Annnd soooo happy we got a B- in Math...I'll take it!!!

6th Grade Revisited - First Semester Ends/Parent-Teacher Conference

Yea!! The moment I have been waiting for…Parent-Teacher conference! I think it will be fun attending as a former 6th grade student, turned parent, turned 6th grader again. I bet this teacher has no idea I am one of her students...um, well, kind of. I feel like I am in one of those Little Rascal’s episodes where Buckwheat puts on a long overcoat, gets on Spanky’s shoulders and they begin to infiltrate adult venues. I just hope I don’t transform right before teach’s eyes into a pouty 6th grader with a chip on my shoulder, viewing this woman across from me as the assignment-giving enemy that she is. I'll have to compose myself, but what if she says things like:

"I would like your son to be more organized”, to which I might spout, “Hey at least we turn everything in on time.” Or this one..." Try to keep your child healthy by having him eat a good breakfast and get enough sleep.” "Here’s a tip; try not sitting us on top of each other. We can eat from the food pyramid and get 12 hours of shut eye, douse our bodies in Purell, but when we have people coughing and sneezing right in our face, the inevitable is going to happen. And another thing, In one breath, you tell us attendance is the most important thing, yet you say don’t come to work…uuhhhh I mean school with a fever.” Hmmmm, I am beginning to understand why my son sometimes questions authority.

Anyway, we made it, through the first semester Yippee!!! As promised, I am posting our first semester grades and a social studies assignment I mentioned before in a previous blog. I will post on Monday and…Stay Tuned